Here’s a question from a reader – an engineer. (We’ll call him Bill)
“I’m at a job that I hate mainly because I feel like every day I’m set up to fail. There’s no job satisfaction. I go to work and try my best but the bosses and organization demand excellence in everything that we do. That is a good goal to have but there’s no way to accomplish all that needs to be and do it perfectly. ………So why would God place me in a situation like that for 8 years??”
Bill, be very careful about asking “why God put you in this place?” I certainly believe God is omnipotent – but I don’t think He micromanages the little details in our lives. I think our own decisions lead us to where we are. But that’s hopeful, because that means you can make new decisions that put you in a different place immediately. Don’t wait for supernatural movement — just start by seeing what you can do to move yourself in a new direction in the next 30-60 days.
When I found myself at the negative end of a business deal a few years ago with $430,000 owed to creditors I’m sure I could have asked, “Why did God do this to me?” But instead, I looked back at the series of decisions I had made that put me in that position. Yes, in reading Proverbs each day I was amazed to see the Biblical principles I had violated in getting me to that unfortunate crisis. God had not done that to me. I simply made decisions that resulted in that end result. And that also meant that instead of just being miserable I was able to very quickly make decisions to walk out of that horrible experience.
Sometimes we assume that our current situation reflects random, individual, disconnected events. Or that God has put us in a situation where we are frustrated and set up to fail. But seldom is either true. Rather, we are where we are because each decision we make is a step in a particular direction. And over time that direction determines our position in our work, our finances, our health, our relationships and our spiritual well-being. If you think God did this to you, then it justifies doing nothing until God changes your situation. And in doing nothing I see people open the door to blaming, resentment, anger, guilt and depression. I think God deserves better from us.
You can look back and see how the path you have been following has gotten you to where you are. If you don’t like the direction it is taking you, what are you willing to do to put yourself on a different path?
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Look at where you are now. Look back 3 years and you can identify the decisions you made that put you right where you are today.
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Where do you want to be 3 years from today? Are you willing to make the decisions to lead to that end result?
Fabulous Dan! We make the decisions and then wonder, I’ve done it. As you pointed out we have the power to do something about it which is exciting to me.
Great post, it was just what I needed today. My job has been pretty rough the past year with a deployment to Afghanistan and personal tragedy. Each and everyday is a struggle and I’ve caught myself wondering why this has happened to me. But I know that sometimes decisions lead to unintended consequences, and sometimes we are in a situation to test our perserverance and figure out who we really are, and what we are capable of doing. Today has been extra tough and this post really helped.
Chandler – yes, it’s not always easy to look back and see the path that led us to an individual day – but the path is there nonetheless. Hope you get through today and see brighter ones ahead.
Dan,
I did get through the day, and this website along with that of Michael Hyatt, Jon Acuff, Seth Godin, Chris Brogan, and Jonathan Mead have been foundational in helping keep me motivated and continue to build my platform. I’ve had more traffic in the last two days than I have in the last 30. Thanks for the website and the podcast. I’ll be hitting up your audible offer this weekend for my long run. 🙂
Thanks for all you do!!
Great post, Dan! Great tips for making decisions. Where do I want to be 3 years from now? I want to grow my blog and online business to allow for more freedom and time with family. I am discovering the steps and decisions I need to make in order to do that. Thanks for the encouragement!
I like how Jack Canfield phrased it:
E + R = O
(Event + Response) = Outcome
It all adds up to accepting responsibility for our choices!
Empowering thought Dan! Love the important principle.
Challenge: What would you add to this post regarding Joseph, Job, apostles and other martyrs’ like American Pastor Saeed Abedini being tortured in prison for trying to help orphans and share God’s Love in islamic republic of Iran?
Anthony – Job I can’t explain. I never have liked that story. With most of the others we can still look at their personal decisions and see how it led right to where they ended up. Good or bad – they made the decisions.
But sometimes there is no tangible explanation like in Job’s case and good people do the right things,make good decisions, and still suffer. So I think we have to be very discerning before we tell someone that their problems are due to choices that they made or sins they must have committed or we end up sounding like Job’s friends. It could be that they have made sinned or made bad choices but in many cases we just don’t know. In these cases where there is no traceable explanation the response should rather be: “Lord what are you trying to teach me and what would you have me do?”
Rochelle – your point is very well taken. I obviously overstated this to make the point that many people are quick to point fingers or blame when we really can just look at the series of decisions that led them there. I don’t understand Job’s case – never have. I guess the Biblical example is that God is ultimately good but I’ve never liked the way that whole story went down. I have a hard time believing God would use a man as a pawn just to make a case.
Well said my friend. Blaming someone else, even God, means not taking personal responsibility for our own actions. Blaming someone else for the mess we find ourselves in may make things easier but it doesn’t make things right because blaming someone else doesn’t change anything. Before our circumstances can change we have to change our circumstances!
Clark – it so common for people to sidestep responsibility by blaming. And if it’s God it’s certainly out of our control. And then the person is stuck.
This will preach! Such a great message for so many circumstances. So many people want “miracles” and “overnight turnarounds” without taking any responsibility for their actions. Now I believe in miracles, but I also believe in action, learning from our mistakes, and using what God has given us for good, not blame.
Jevonnah – hey I wish it were preached more. It’s dicey telling Christians they need to take more responsibility for where they are. Seems so handy to just blame God.
Thanks for sharing Dan! Love it. I can certainly relate being an engineer, making similar mistakes in the past. Sometimes we just have to work in a job we don’t love to help our families… But for 8 years? I think 2 years or less is reasonable. Then – it’s my obligation to think outside of the box.