If you think you’re saving money by not eating out, you may be mistaken. This is not about the math, this is about the missed connections. Informal time spent with other people leads to new thinking, new opportunities, and a return on your investment that can far outweigh the cost of the food itself.
Episode #856 November 11, 2022
Hi this is Dan Miller – and yes you’re listening to the 48 Days Radio show – where each week we take 48 minutes to dive into real-life questions about finding your passion, deciding what kind of life you want to live – and then finding or creating work that allows you to show up every day, excited to be able to do something that is meaningful, fulfilling – and profitable. This is where normal, indecision and ambiguity come to die. Welcome to the 48 Days Radio Show.
Making Connections By Sharing Meals Together
You may be wondering why we start off a career and business podcast talking about eating together. We do talk about making connections, how you find ideas, how you find work that you love and how you create a business that you love.
There’s a new study just done in September of 2022, where they ask families about this process of eating together. It shows that regular family dinners can be the key to reducing stress levels in the household. 91% of families said that they are less stressed if they spend time eating dinner together as a family. Sharing meals with others is a great way to reduce stress, boost self-esteem, and improve social connections, particularly for kids. Making connections with friends, family, co-workers, and neighbors benefits people beyond stress relief.
In fact, this survey found people say sharing a meal reminds them of the importance of making connections with other people. They said it reminds them to slow down and take a break.
I heard on EntreLeadership, the Dave Ramsey podcast, recently that people who work there at the Dave Ramsey organization are not allowed to eat lunch at their workstations. Now that may seem inefficient because somebody can just keep working while they’re eating. No, they’re not allowed to do that. They have to go to the cafeteria, even if they brought their own lunch, so they can mingle and make connections with other people.
You’ve heard me talk about my now 30-plus-year friendship with Dave Ramsey. That didn’t start as a business relationship. It started by going to lunch together with our families after church. Then we both started teaching Sunday school classes together at the same church. That grew into meeting together to brainstorm about what we might do on a larger scale — Dave with finances and me with careers. Dave and Sharon, Joanne and I spent many, many meals together. We went to conferences together, supporting each other as our businesses grew. We still get together for meals. We just recently were in their home, continuing to connect.
David Bach wrote a book a few years ago called The Latte Factor that shared how ridiculous it was to spend $3.50 a day for a latte. If you add that up over 40 years, you’d have more than $50,000. If instead, you had invested that properly, you’d have close to a million dollars by retirement just by not spending that $3.50 a day. Now, that’s a mathematical formula, and you can make a case for that. But there’s another part of that that is missed.
Joanne and I spend roughly $1,000 a month on meals at our Clubhouse here in our community. It’s not because we can’t fix meals at our house. We certainly can. But it’s because we’re meeting and making connections with our neighbors. If we just look at the math on that, that’s $12,000 a year. Over 20 years at 7% return, that would be a half million dollars. That’s a lot of money if we’re looking just at mathematics. But the connections we’ve made during those meals have opened new doors for me to speak to the CEO Roundtable where I’ve made some really valuable connections.
Most all my big business decisions have been made over meals. Three years ago, Joanne and I had dinner with a friend of hers, and that lady’s husband and I hit it off. We stayed in touch and then I invited him to join my mastermind. We continued sharing business ideas then we started an investment company together. Now we’re negotiating to make a major investment in a company we’re really excited about. That all started by making connections over tacos.
Keith Ferrazzi wrote a book titled, Never Eat Alone and Other Secrets To Success, One Relationship at a Time. I encourage you to check it out and be careful how you look at new connections opportunities. The next book I’m working on has to do with just that, the power of those connections and how we can foster those connections and open the doors of opportunity. I’m excited about working on that book, which will be released in 2023.
Questions:
I cannot imagine living a life where work isn’t the highest priority and use of my time.
My work is a high priority because I enjoy it so much. That’s really the key.
I have never had work that I hated or that treated me badly. I have had some jobs that were a means to an end, not necessarily something I want to do for the rest of my life.
I think it’s a mindset thing. Check out 48 Days To Master Your Mindset here.
I lost my job a month ago and started a new one this week. I got a text from my boss this morning saying I’m done. I don’t know what to do or where to turn.
The fact that you were able to get those jobs is a pretty positive sign. You can do it again. Right now, when companies are so desperate to bring people on, people who have any kind of clear set of skills that aligns with what the company needs to accomplish, makes it a perfect time. There are so many opportunities. So hold your head high and look for another position that aligns with you, your values, dreams and passions as well as your personality style.
I would encourage you also to do some self-reflection, possibly even asking the companies who let you go for some feedback. Understanding how you can improve can make a huge difference as you move foward.
I am having trouble keeping jobs. I need help.
You ought to be able to see some repeated patterns here. Are you showing up late? Are you hard to manage? Are you questioning everything the bosses say? Take a hard look at what may be happening.
We do have some coaching resources that might help you. Find out more about coaching here.
I have an ideal job but I really hate it.
Focus on the life you want to live and realize that our lives have seasons. If this job is allowing you to spend more time with your kids during this season of your life, that might be fine, if it’s helping you live the life you want to live. Buf it you hate your job, it may not be worth it. There are other things you can do that would afford you the time with your kids during this season. Explore the possibilities.
Hi Dan, I’m an over-the-road trucker, and I’ve hated my job for years.
To be an over-the-road trucker, you obviously have a wide variety of skills. Identify those skills that would have value for any company and any work situation. Also look inward — at yourself. What are those personal styles? What is your DISC report? How do you relate to other people? What kind of environments do you thrive in? How important is it to have time with your family? What are the ages of your boys right now? Again, what season of life are you in? Those are all things that you want to identify and then look at those recurring dreams and passions that you have and start to make a list of the opportunities that are well-suited for you and the life you want to live.
Can I apply for another job in this company after being here for only three weeks?
Absolutely! I would consider a miracle that you are in the right place at the right time for that job. Go for it!
Quotation:
[click_to_tweet tweet=”“If you really want to make a friend, go to someone’s house and eat with him… The people who give you their food give you their heart.” Cesar Chavez @48daysteam” quote=”“If you really want to make a friend, go to someone’s house and eat with him… The people who give you their food give you their heart.” Cesar Chavez”]
Resource:
Know yourself and those you work with: https://www.48days.com/disc/
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